haix... i don't know how long ago was the time since i've last blogged, but yea, i'm back. Wonder if it's a good thing that i'm starting to pour out my feelings into the internet again, or if it's a bad thing, spelling that i'm becoming more emo. i don't know!!
okay. i'm not all that good recently. Sprained my ankle for starters. what a joke. i fell while trying to get out of lecture. and usually it's the lecture that kills people. not the rush out for break. anyways, i did fall, pulled 2 ligaments and tadah. Now i'm practically dependent on alot of people for a lot of things. and i'm feeling downright a burden.
There're a few things that i hate to be in life. Hate to be ostracized, hate to be called names, ESPECIALLY hate to be accused, hate to be a burden to people, etc etc. I'm already a really dependent freak, and this spoilt ankle of mine just made me more so. Orson, Mom, dad, grandma, spending so much time and money on me. Ugh. I don't like it... I don't like that they have to go through extra trouble coz of me, and i don't like that i have not much of a choice but to have them go through that trouble. It bugs and tugs and tears my insides out just to think of it.
I feel guilty. Like a criminal, like a spoilt old brat with a sense of conscience. I'm trying to make it up to people, but somehow i don't know how. Like i'm someone born to accept, not born to give. and it is in this extra guilt that will bear down on every limp of my foot, that i will walk with for these few more days.
Sentence? Guilty or not guilty, it's up to the Jury to decide. Whoever they are.
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